~*~

Shortly there after disaster stroke, Disaster was wearing a filthy green t-shirt and was named Opus, I knew from the others that his name was actually Albert, but no-one ever called him enything but Opus. He werent bothered with me at all, actually then he seemed to find me annoying at best. But Early seemed to like him, hanging out with him all the time, and so they hardly ever spoke to me, I tried to involve Ade in all of this, but he just shook his head and mumbled that i had to deal with this myself, and that he wanted absolutely no part of some stupid lovers dispute. Lovers dispute -ha! that was the overstatement of the year, I had hardly even spoken to Early since he had given me the 'its not you, is me there is something wrong with, and you decerve so much better' speach. But apparently Opus didnt decerve better? or? I was so confused..

One day when Opus had been around for like 2 months, I decided to confront Early with this, I walked straight up to him and grabbed his shoulders, turning him around and forced him to look at me, "What the hell is wrong with you?" I demanded.

"Whoa there" Early said, clearly confused. "what is wrong, man?"

"wrong? what is wrong? How can you even ask that?" I cried, stepping back from Early, looking over his shoulder only to see Opus standing there, looking at the scene unravel.

"Look Cain, this is not the time, nor the place for that shit" Early said with a slightly applogizing tone.

"Its never..." I said but was cut off by Opus, who wrapped an arm around Early's shoulders "Come on man, we have places to be and people to see"

As Opus hauled away with my best friend, MY best friend.. I could have screamed! Early had cleverly avoided the whole incident with Benjamin, even if he knew that it meant a lot to me, i could only conclude it meant absolutely nothing to him, what had i been thinking? a pretty young thing like him, he would give it up to several men each day, what made me think i was special?

Layla tried to comfort me, but i would let no one close at all, i had to deal with this my own way, and i sure as hell didnt need some lame assed social worker to spill it to, i didnt want her to know what i had done with Early, maybe she would kick me out of the shelter? At the nun's boys home, we had to be carefull even if we only kissed out back behind the back door, had they caught us in the act they would surely have sent the culprits on to somewhere else. Spending time alone just walking the streets at night with nothing to do, i got my thoughts all straightened out, Early was right, it was nothing special, I had thought he liked me in 'that' way, But i had brought this onto myself in the second i had trusted him, Giving your body was easy, but giving your soul to someone else was only setting one self up for heartache. right there that night i decided that i would never leave myself in that wounerable place again.

Ade had worried about me, and Early for that matter. You didnt have to be a psychic to know that something was completely wrong. I saw him talking to Early, looking aboslutely mortified as Early mumbled some muffled words, apparently confirming what he had worried about in the first place.. "Opus is bad news, he always were" He hissed to Early. Early just nodded and looked away at Ade, studying a spot on the wall.

Later I caught Ade alone in the dining hall, "So.. I saw you talking with Early" i said carefully

Ade nodded "yea"

"So?"

"Do you know who Opus is at all?" Ade said with a flat voice.

"No, can't say that i do" I said.

"He is bad news kid, he brings nothing but death and destruction" Ade whispered as he turned to me, looking me straight into my eyes, "He is doing horse" I must have looked like a giant question mark, because Ade smiled sadly as he ruffled my hair "Opus is a juicer, and pretty soon, your precious Early will be too, that shit works fast"

"Heroin?" I whispered. I had heard about it, even had it offered more than once, but i had always stayed clear of it, the name alone seemed like a cuse.

"Yes" Ade said softly, "And Early dont even see it comming, he thinks that Opus is his bud, but hes not, junkies are nobodys friends"

"Did he tell you this?" I asked pretending not to be hurt by the fact that Early would have told Ade about this, and not me.

"Not really" Ade said with a smug expression, "I overheard them in the bathroom" He pointed towards the bathroom door right besides us. "Early was having the shakes, and he had thown up all over the bathroom, Opus knew this was his golden oppertunity, yea i have seen the way he looks at Early, i knew this would happen sooner or later."

"what?" I whispered, breathlessly.

"He had no money, and was too sick to come up with any, so he turned to Opus, pleading him for a hit" Ade said with a serious tone. "This is what Opus does best, he gets his stuff for half the price of everybody else, because he made a living out of making other junkies to pay full price and then some, to whatever group hired him in the first place". I just stood there and listened, not able to say a word, something told me that i did not need to hear this from Ade, i knew what had happened allready. "And then" Ade said "Then he said, that he would split what he had with Early, but it would cost him a favour"

Ade sighed "And he did"

I closed my eyes and imagined the scenario, this was just too much, the lowest of the lowest, how did that happen to my friend and i didnt even see it comming? had i even decerved to be his friend then?

"He let him do it to him, standing in a pool of his own damn vomit" Ade said.

"I..I.. I dont feel so good" I stammered, and Ade nodded as i suddely fled the dining room.

Three days later i saw Early in the shelter again, he had been gone since he had spoken to Ade. I walked up to him, and swallowed my pride, "Early?" i said "Where have you been? are you alright?"

"I'm fine kid" He said, smiling.

Just the fact that he called me kid pissed me off, he was only 6 months older than i was, and that didnt give him the right to speak to me like he was my parent or something. "We were worried" I said "I thought that someone had hurt you"

Early smiled and placed a hand on my shoulder "You shouldent worry, I can take care of myself"

"Ade dont seem to think so" i stated in defense.

"Ade is a gossiping little bitch" Early sneered, but then smiled at me with a carefree shrug "You shouldent listen too much to his paranoid shit, he will screw with your head if he can" His eyes strayed to something behind me, i didnt even need to turn around to know it was Opus standing there. "Look i gotta go, stay fresh darling" he chirped and shallowly kissed my cheek as he brushed past me, leaving me alone in the room.

It was hard to speak with Early without his shadow hanging about, I tried. I tried to get an answer to what Ade had said, but he kept avoiding answering, untill one night where Opus was out of the house, but Early was in. I asked him if he was sleeping with that bum.

He looked at me with a sad expression and after long moments in silence he said "Not for free"

"Gawds Early" I sighed. "I wish you wouldent" I cupped his face with my hands and looked directly at him, he was so close i could smell his breath that smelled sweet of apples, And I wanted nothing more but to kiss him and feel those soft lips against mine once more, but i had nothing of value to offer him, and so those soft lips was off limits. "We could go" I whispered, almost on the verge of tears "We could just leave, go to some other city"

He smiled as he leaned forward and planted a tender kiss right on my lips, it happened so fast that i didnt get time to react, "You are a fool Cain" he whispered "But a sweet one" He moved out of my touch and stood up, i could see his inner turmoil written across his face, maybe he really wanted to elope with me, but didnt know how.. and just maybe all he needed was time.

In the midst of all my own heartache, i had not noticed that Lucille had given in to Ade's effords. I know i should feel happy for them both, but i was so dark and terrible inside that i couldent feel a thing.

Early had a giant fight with Layla, she almost tossed him out, but Ade and Lucille managed to talk her from it, I didnt do anything, I whom had been Earlys champion, did not come to his defense, nor do i think that he would want me to.

Seeing Early passed out on the floor broke my heart every time, but there was nothing i could do.

Then 3 months before my 18'th birthday, Layla pulled me aside and said that she had had a phone call from the police, and that my father had apparently searched for me, he had lost track of me when i had left the boys home, and now because i had been stopped and noted by the police, they had noticed that i was wanted, and had contacted my father.

I was completely confused, my father had actually filed a missing person's case at the police station? I tought he hated me, given all i knew about him was that i had the same eyes as he had, the nuns had said that over and over again, that i had the same cold, evil grey eyes as my father. And it got on my nerves that they all knew who my father was, and where to find him, but refused to help me because he had requested it so, and then there was the naming thing too, after all.. He named me Cain after the first kinslayer in the bible. Cain, who's crops shall never grow, and everything around him shall wither and die, punishing for ever more for his crime. I wondered what my crime was since i had earned that name.

Layla understood my confusion, but she was thrilled about it all, this was the first time she had ever seen this happen, that the police had actually contacted the parents, she said that half the kids here was filed under missing persons, but no one ever botherd to actually look for them. But now i got to go home to my family, and surely i had to be relieved about that! I would get to get back to school, and live like normal kids. I was not so sure about that, i had my doubts about my fathers sanity.

She told me that the next day a social worker would come pick me up and drive me to my family, but it was not like i had anything to pack, so all she could really do for me was to throw me a little goodbye party, meaning that she would pay for whatever food i requested, and without a doubt in my mind i answered 'pancakes' - That made her laugh, she was still skaing her head in amusement as she left the shelter to do groseries.

Opus had returned, so getting to talk to Early was a little harder than i had thought, Opus was acting like he freaking owned Early and his time, on second thought, maybe he did.. i didnt know just how many favours he owed Opus, So i gave up on talking to Early, which saddned me since he was really the only one i wanted to say goodbye too, and would miss like crazy. Then it struck me, i would proberly never see him again, this terrible thought i pushed away, because it was just too horrible to even think.

As Layla was preparing the pancakes, I had seen Early walk up the stairs, and so i followed him up, offering Ade some lame excuse to leave. Early did not go to his room, but went straight to the bathroom, where i followed, As i came in the door i saw him lifting the top lid of the toilet to the flush tank, I stood there and watched as he stuck his arm down there and hauled up a little bag that he quickly stuck in his pocket, turning around he saw me, and he got so surprised that he looked like he was about to have a heartattack. "Christ! Cain! you scared me" he breathed and held a hand on his chest to even his breathing. "What are you doing snooping about like that?"

"I wanted to see you for a moment" i said, "But these days i suppose i will have to pay for 10 minutes of your time"

"ouch" Early said and frowned. "that was cruel, man"

"whatever" I said flatly. "I just wanted to tell you that I am leaving tomorrow, my dad apparently wants me home all of a sudden, and the coppers, social office and Layla all seem to agree with him"

"Leaving?" Early whispered, "congratulations"

"Thanks" I said, and began to turn to leave the bathroom, when Early grabbed my shoulder and turned me around.

He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me for real, i could feel his heartbeat hammer away in his chest, and his hands tremble slightly, I should have pushed him off me, i should have told him to go to hell, but i didnt, i just pressed close to his slender body and let it happen. Somewhere in the back of my mind i knew i should feel cheap, but i didnt.. i felt loved. Loved by the only one i wanted to be loved by.

It felt like we had spent enternity on that crummy bathroom enjoying eachoter, and as we broke off the last kiss and caught our breath, Early surprised me, caressing me tenderly, eternity felt like seconds, i dont know what i felt, but i know it felt good in a strange bittersweet way.

"I will miss you teribly" Early whispered as he kissed my knuckles. "I really like you Cain, i know i am crummy at showing it, but.." He looked up at me and i spotted tears in the corners of his eyes, "I am not lying when i say this, you have to believe me, i should have said or done something i know.. i just got caught up in my life's insanity, i never should have pushed you away"

I rested my forehead against his and kissed him softly "thats all i ever wanted to hear" i whispered.

"I am such a fucking fool" He whispered back, letting his tears flow freely, which unnerved me, and caused tears of my own. I had never seen Early cry before. "I messed up, and now i am being left behind again" he whispered brokenly.

"Come with me then" I whispered back.

"I cant" he said softly as he shook his head slowly "This is your life to screw up" he added with a giggle.

"I will find you again" i vowed valiantly.

"You do that, Cain knight of Simcity" he said with an amused voice like he didnt believe me.

The Social worker arrived as Lucille, Ade, Early and I had sat down for breakfast, I could see Early sadden as the woman walked into the dining room together with Layla and asked for Cain Matthew. i hadent heard that surname for ages, not that i had ever felt it was mine anyways, it was just something the nuns had come up with because i needed a surname.

As i came back from Layla's office, that was actually an old kitchen on the second story that she had made into a simple office. Clutching the papers she had handed me, i saw Early talking to the social worker woman, who had introduced herself as Miss Sally. He looked like he tried to undestand what she said, but i knew him better than that, he had stopped listening, he had gotten the information he was seeking and by the looks of him it didnt make him any happier.

When Miss Sally saw me she turned to me and said "So mr. Matthew are you ready?"

"I s'pose so" I said with a messured tone. And then to my surprise Early pulled me tight and kissed me, he didnt kiss me like he had done when we had been togehter, he didnt kiss me like a brother either, he kissed me like i was his lover, strangely i thought that it was just too cruel that he would do that now, because now i couldent leave him behind, maybe that was what he secretly hoped for.

"I will miss you" He whispered as the kiss ended and he hugged me.

"I promised you i'd find you someday" I whispered back "and i will"

"Are you scared?" he said softly.

"shitless" i said, smiling.

This would be my last conversation with Early for a long time, i said my goodbyes to everyone there, and then followed Miss Sally to the taxi that waited outside, I was so scared i didnt even speak as we got in the car, all i knew was that this was the beginning of something new.

-tbc-

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Here are some outtakes, some i just liked but couldent use, and some was just hilarious.. its SIMS after all!

I really liked this, but i couldent make it fir the story.. darnit!

Heh, Opus/Albert and Cain actually DID get into a fight, that was just so damn precious, but the piccy was too lousy to use.

this just cracks me up!

'oh my, would you look at that!' - 'Yea amazing it can do that innit?'

'What the hell are you looking at? we're having a private convo here... '

Bwahahahaha! i don't know why my sims sucks so much at sexscenes.

'Whoa - Duuude!'